"I was at an auction for Peni$es. “It’s all over the Bible, dearest.”   “The Bible says nothing about who’s supposed to be brewing coffee!” And I admitted that between the pandemic and the Trump administration I’ve been feeling a paralyzing mix of anxiety and depression. "Relatives of yours? “You know, a blow job every now and again makes my husband very generous!” she replied. By SteveP. "What the hell is *testiculating*?"

The Best Funny Wife Jokes. By this time the wife is getting upset and shouts: "I'VE ALREADY TOLD YOU TWICE, MY HUSBAND, YOUR BOSS, DIED LAST WEEK! Q: What to give a man who’s got everything? I came across it again a few minutes later. That's a weird way to start a conversation. Joke 38: But then it’s already too late for him. The judge says, "You're also charged with beating your mother-in-law to death with a hammer." The man explains the. Joke 28: She hates to be interrupted.“. A man simply doesn’t have a clue what real happiness is until he gets married.

", One day, as he was walking through a public park, he spied what he considered to be a very pretty, silver-haired lady sitting alone on a park bench. I said no problem and locked her out of the house. The big ones sold for $1000 and the tiny ones for $10.". He came home at lunch time and snuck in the house, to find his wife with another man on top of her. Joke 19: Why I can’t I have no kids and three money? “I would like to make an appointment for next Tuesday, for my husband Jack.”, Marriage is a relationship were one person is always right…………and the other is the husband. But she figured out I was only after my money. ?,” screamed Mary, “IT TAKE 3 HOURS TO GET RUN OVER BY A CAR!?

“Alright” replied Sally “I’ll serve on this one, I may have been wrong about the capital punishment thing after all.”, Harry had been feeling sick lately and was finally convinced to see the Doctor after his wife Suzy’s urging. Husband: And? Joke 34: One easy step to lose an argument with a wife: 1) Argue. Required fields are marked *, Top 50 Funny Husband and Wife Jokes in English. More jokes about: marriage, wife. Turns out I am a cunt & she does want me to fuck off. Any position you could imagine. “Aw shucks!” cried the man, “I must have left it home!” “Yeah right!” screamed his wife, “You know it expired 3 months ago!” At a loss for words, the cop asked the woman “are you always so tough on him? So I took the batteries out of the smoke alarm. What are you referring to?”, “C’mon Harry, please tell me what you were referring to.”, “Well I was going to remark about how your eyesight seems to be working just fine!”. “Honey,” said the man turning to his spouse “do you mind picking up that pen for me?”, “Harry,” whined Mary, to her husband of 20 years. “What is wrong?”. Joke 10: Wife: I try to avoid things that make me fat, like scales, mirrors and photographs. Luckily they let him out after 3 hours and he walked in the door to his house at 8 o’clock. She was was great at finding faults.


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